


Fault Lines Tremble Underneath My Glass House

by TheQueerPanda



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Angst, Clexa, F/F, Homeless AU, Homophobic Language, Lexa has to deal with homophobic parents, Slow Burn, artist!Clarke, college student!Clarke, eventual fluff but we gotta get passed some hard stuff first, homeless!Lexa, lots of fluff eventually, modern clexa au
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-14
Updated: 2016-04-19
Packaged: 2018-06-02 03:58:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,759
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6549790
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheQueerPanda/pseuds/TheQueerPanda
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Homeless Clexa AU, where Lexa's homophobic parents find out she's dating a girl and gets thrown out of the house, and finds herself driving around the country, seeing wherever life takes her. Luckily for her, she meets someone along the way.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. There's no rush

**Author's Note:**

> ((Yes, the title of this fic comes from the song Earth by Sleeping At Last!!!!))
> 
> I'm still super messed up about everything going on with Lexa, so writing fanfiction has become my favorite coping mechanic.  
> (Seriously, fuck you, JRotinhell.)
> 
> I really hope you guys enjoy this fic considering it's the first Clexa fic I'm posting!!  
> I'm planning to update consistently, but we'll see!!
> 
> Comments are always appreciated by the way, I like hearing feedback !!
> 
> Sorry if this chapter is a bit short, I just need to get it started!

"I don't know if I'm ready to tell them, Cos.."  
Lexa felt a hand gently grip her shoulder and tilted her head back slightly to see her girlfriend standing close behind her.  
"You don't have to do it until you are, just know I'll be here by your side when you finally do tell them."

Lexa turned completely to face Costia, wrapping her arms around the shorter girls waist and pulling her in.  
"Thank you, I just..I want to enjoy what we have now."  
Costia draped her arms lightly over Lexa's shoulders and nestled her nose into the crook of her taller girlfriends' neck.

"I agree, Lex..."  
She dragged out that final letter, allowing her warm breath to linger on Lexa's neck. It sent a small chill down her spine.  
"It's late, we should get some sleep. You're parents know you're spending the night anyways, right?"

The two girls were in their final year of high school, both 17 years old.  
Lexa knew her parents wouldn't be too fond of the fact she was only interested in girls, and she also knew she only had another year to go until she moved out of her parents house. Just a few more months until she heard back from Trigeda University, the college she'd applied to. All she had to do was wait until she was settled into her dorm, or new apartment, and she'd never have to worry about her parents accidentally finding out her secret. She didn't dare think about what they'd say to her, just the thought gave Lexa anxiety that she wasn't prepared to deal with on her own. That's why she was glad to have Costia. 

"I guess that's one perk of being in the closet.. I get to have sleepovers with my girlfriend."  
Lexa said with a smile and a small chuckle and began to lightly sway, still holding onto her favorite person.

Costia nodded against Lexa's skin and looked up at her.  
"That's a good point, babe. But really, it's late. We should lay down and put on a movie or something."

Lexa nodded and Costia separated from her to get the two of them proper sleep attire. After a few minutes in her dresser, she tossed Lexa some sleep shorts and an old tee shirt. The two changed in the same room, almost shamelessly. Almost. Lexa was still bashful and tried to respect her girlfriend by facing the other way, and Costia could only poke her tongue out and laugh.  
"You're so adorable, Lex. You don't have to be so shy."

The two finished changing and found themselves cuddled up in Costia's warm bed. Lexa laid down behind Costia and draped her arm around the smaller girls waist and Costia wiggled back into Lexa in response. Costia had managed to turn on the TV, and playing on the screen was something both girls had seen one too many times. Before long, both girls were sound asleep.  
___

When Lexa woke up, she realized two things. One, she had several missed calls from her mom, and two being that Costia was no longer in bed with her.  
She took the time she had to herself to call her mom back, feeling a wave of anxiety course through her veins.

Her mother wasn't typically an angry person, but missed calls were a big deal. Lexa tried convincing herself before that it was because her mom loved her and wanted to make sure she was ok, but as she grew up she realized her mother just liked having tabs on her 24/7 to make sure she stayed out of trouble, because Lexa was supposed to be a perfect child who got perfect grades and who never slipped up. She found it harder to please her mother as time passed, and she seemed to be making mistake after mistake. Her anxiety had only gotten worse during high school, but luckily for her, it would be over soon.

She quickly dialed her moms number into her cell phone and held it to her ear while her hand, and whole arm really, shook. 

"Hello? Mom?"

"Alexandria, why didn't you pick up when I called before?"

"I'm sorry, I was still sleeping. I tried getting back to you once I saw the missed calls."

When her mother began to speak again, the door creaked open and Costia stepped back inside and quietly shut it behind her, trying her hardest not to disturb the call.

Lexa rolled her eyes at her mothers tone.

"Mom, everything's fine. Her mom is making us breakfast now."

A smirk grew on Costia's face and she climbed over to the bed and at upright next to Lexa. The lie had her pretty amused.

"I gotta go, I'll check in with you later...yes I'll let you know when I'm going to drive home. Ok, bye."

She hung up her phone and tossed it to the foot of the bed, and threw herself back onto the pillows she'd slept on. Costia looked down at her and brushed some of the hair that had fallen out of Lexa's braids back behind her ears, and cupped her face with a hand. 

"I don't understand why she's always so frantic about me being over here. I just want to have a nice day with you, I don't want to worry about anything."

"Lexa, you're safe here. Your moms got nothing to worry about."

She shook her head and looked up at her girlfriend.

"It's like I live in a glass house, right on top of an active fault line. And at any damn moment, my home could shatter. Just like that everything can be destroyed. It's fucking terrifying, Costia. I'm never safe."

A tense silence surrounded the two as they stared at each other. Neither of them were very good at talking about the things that hurt them, so they often found themselves not talking at all.

Costia gave in after a few moments and shrugged.  
"Well, my mom wasn't the one to make breakfast considering she's out of town, but someone certainly did."  
She bent down to plant a gentle kiss on her girlfriends forehead as her eyes lit up.  
"It'll get cold if we don't get downstairs now."

"Is there bacon?"  
Lexa could feel her mouth watering.

Once she got the nod of approval from her girlfriend, she got out of bed and took Costia's hand and led them into the kitchen.


	2. Little Do You Know

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry if it seems a bit rushed, I'm just eager to get this going!
> 
> Once the story picks up it'll probably be a better read, just bear with me. I'm still pretty new at this!  
> Feedback would be really nice!
> 
> I'm sorry if the ending kind of came out of nowhere. I noticed as I was writing that I was straying away from my plot line so I had to redirect myself. It was hard to write the ending because it mirrors a conversation I've had with my dad in real life, so I wasn't able to go too far in detail.  
> Hopefully you guys understand.
> 
> The next chapter will be up soon<3

Costia was sitting on a counter top, watching her girlfriend do the dishes for her. Lexa liked cleaning anyways.  
She felt as though she was always dirty, mainly from hiding from her parents, so cleaning made her feel better in some way. As if she was also cleaning herself. Her parents made her feel like she could never be clean enough.  
Lexa never explained this to Costia, so she wasn't sure if she knew why she was always so eager to get to the sink after they ate. Really, what teenager likes doing dishes as much as Lexa Woods?

"Lex, thank you for helping. I hate doing chores." 

"Yeah no problem, I really don't mind."  
She smiled as she scrubbed without offering any further explanation. 

"My parents are always trying to tell me to act more like you, you're way more responsible than I am."

She smiled to her girlfriend and Lexa offered her a small smile in response. When she looked away, her expression changed cold-turkey.  
Lexa didn't look up at Costia after that. Not even after she was done scrubbing the plates and even after everything was tucked away in the dishwasher. She just walked to the kitchen table and sat down in a chair. Her elbow was bent and resting on the table, holding her face with her hand. She looked down at the table and not up even once.  
Her thoughts quickly became overwhelming.

Why would her parents want her to be more like me? She doesn't have anything to change for them, or anything to hide. My parents would hate me. I'm the one who needs to change.

Costia could see the intent look on Lexa's face and dropped down off of the counter and sat down next to Lexa at the table, placing her hand on her tense girlfriends back and rubbing to try and relax her.

"If you need to talk, than talk, Lexa."  
Lexa glanced over at her girlfriend and blinked away the tears that began welling in her eyes. Still, though, she said nothing.  
Costia wrapped her arm all the way around Lexa along with the other, pulling her into a comforting embrace.  
Once Lexa was secured in Costia's arms, she let everything go. The tears wouldn't stop coming. 

"I..I don't know what to do, Cos.."  
Her voice shook as she managed to get the words out.  
"They're going to hate me, but I can't keep this from them. I've always been so honest and we've always been so close. They should know."  
Costia whispered sweet nothings to her sobbing girlfriend, like "it's ok", and "you're safe".  
Once Lexa was calmed down enough, she finally voiced an opinion.  
"Lex, have you ever asked your parents what they thought about gay people?"  
Lexa nodded her head and rested her forehead against Costia's warm shoulder. 

"They told me that I could go to hell for even asking about them. That they're dirty and need to be saved."

Neither girl spoke for what seemed like an eternity. Lexa shrugged out of Costia's embrace and stood up slowly.  
"I need to go shower, be back in a few minutes."

Costia gave her a small nod and watched as her girlfriend disappeared down the hallway.  
She made her way back into her bedroom and sat down on the edge of the bed, noticing Lexa's phone and all of the new missed calls. She wasn't sure if using Lexa's phone was a good idea, so she didn't. She just tucked it away into Lexa's bag. Remembering Lexa's bag, she shimmied off of her bed and over to her bedside drawer and pulled it open, being relieved to see a little silver box sill sitting right on top. That too, went into Lexa's bag.  
___

Lexa shut the bathroom door behind her and once she heard the click of it locking, she began to strip down. She kicked her borrowed clothes to the side and turned to look at herself in the counters mirror.  
"Filthy."  
The word came out angrier than she expected.  
She stared at her own reflection for a good minute before she managed to pull herself away. She stepped into the bathtub and turned the nob to the right, allowing warm water to spurt out of the shower head, and eventually come out in a steady stream.  
She scrubbed herself with the body wash that was on the shelf until she felt like it was enough. Although, as much as she used, it never truly felt like enough.  
__

Costia scrolled through her phone and patiently waited for Lexa to be finished. She had music playing at a decent volume as well. She couldn't hear over it well enough to notice that Lexa had gotten out of the shower and stood in front of the bedroom door wrapped in a towel.

Costia looked up from her phone and grinned.  
"All clean?"

Lexa let out a breathy chuckle and shook her head.  
"Never."

Costia motioned for Lexa to look through her bag.  
"After you get dressed you should check your phone, I think you have some more missed-"

"Shit, more? It's only been like two hours since I talked to my mom!"  
She scrambled across the room, carefully holding her towel to her body, and searching through her bag for the clothes she wore yesterday. She also grabbed her phone and frantically typed in her passcode.

Her facial expression went from worried, to annoyed.  
"It's just Anya. She's supposed to be meeting up with me later."

Costia nodded and laid down on her bed, going back to check her phone. 

"Ok, but you really should get dressed first."

Lexa went back through her bag to pull out her clothes, and found the box Costia had left.  
"What's this, Cos?"  
She looked up to her girlfriend with a confused smile.

"Open it up and see for yourself."

Lexa did as she was told and opened it, and her smile widened immensely.  
"It's beautiful, thank you so much!"  
Lexa's eyes scanned the necklace and then her girlfriend who was proudly looking down at her.

"I saw you looking at it in the store a while back, and I wanted to get it for you. You've been under a lot of stress lately, so you deserve something nice."  
The necklace had a small silver chain, with a Tree Of Life pendant dangling from it. This symbol meant a lot to Lexa, it meant strength. 

"Help me put it on?"  
She stood up and Costia reached out to grab it, and Lexa held her wet hair up with one hand, and her towel up with the other.

Once the clasp was closed, Lexa turned to give her girlfriend a sweet kiss.  
"I love it."  
Costia smiled into the kiss and then looked back at her.  
"And I love you. You smell nice too, by the way. Now go get dressed."

Lexa nodded and went back into the bathroom to get dressed. She knew Costia had seen her body before, but she was still overtly bashful. 

After a little while, Lexa had said her goodbyes to Costia and left to head home. It was already pretty late in the day and she had to get back.

Costia only lived about ten minutes away from her house, but she still made a conscious effort to get there any faster.  
__

Eventually she pulled into the long driveway and parked her car next to her moms, hesitantly opening the door and sliding out. 

She made her way up to the front door and used her keys to unlock it, pushing it open and stepping inside.

"Mom, I'm home."  
She waited for a response, but was met with silence.

"Hello?"  
Her voice was a little louder this time.

"Oh, Alexandria, you're back. I didn't know, you never called to let me know."  
Her mom peeped her head around the corner and then walked down the hallway to greet her daughter at the door. 

"Sorry, I forgot to call. I just wanted to get home, I have to get ready for-"  
"Where did this come from?"  
Her mom had cut her off and her stare was directed to the necklace she had received from Costia.

Lexa's face flushed into a pale white and she placed her hand over the pendant.  
"F-from Costia, as um..to say congratulations for getting accepted into Trigeda."  
Her mom nodded slowly at the excuse.

"You know I don't like you hanging out with that fa-..with her. Anyways, your official papers came in. You're all set for the fall."

Lexa caught her mom about to say a slur, and how she redirected herself. Lexa knew her mom had a feeling about Costias sexuality, but she didn't want her daughter to know. Little did she know, Lexa was very aware. It was part of the reason Lexa was so afraid that it would only get harder to keep her secret. She was scared to think of what would happen if her mom grew too suspicious. She's probably be forbidden from seeing Costia, and that's the last thing she wanted.

Lexa swallowed her anxiety and smiled.  
"That's awesome, I can't wait!"

She pushed passed her mom, avoiding any more questions. She secured herself in her room and let out a shaky sigh, tossing her bag to the corner of her room.  
She picked out a brand new outfit from her closet and pulled off the clothes she'd been wearing.  
And, once again, her phone buzzed. It was a message from Anya.

A: Hey, just wanted you to know that I have your fakey. I'll swing by to pick 

Lexa's eyes widened. She quickly sent her reply.

L: Fake ID? You didn't tell me where you were taking me yet

Not even a full minute later until she got another text. 

A: You're gonna be 18 soon and you've never gotten drunk. It's time you did. 

Lexa shook her head and typed out her response, and then put her phone in her pocket. 

L: Just keep an eye out for me once I'm drunk

 

In a matter of minutes she heard loud honking coming from outside. She left her room and scrambled downstairs. 

"Mom, I'm going with Anya, bye!"

She didn't wait for her to respond, she was already out the door.

Anya was about two years older than Lexa, making her 19 years old. The two were good friends during high school and managed to reconnect after Anya found out Lexa applied to the same college she'd been going to. 

Anya smiled wildly and Lexa swung the passenger side door open and climbed inside. 

"It's good to see you, Lex."  
Anya threw her arms around her friend.

"You too. Alright, now tell me where you're taking me."

Anya pulled away and reached into the cup holder next to her.

"Prepare yourself for a night full of fun, music, and-"

She held the fake ID out to Lexa with a mischievous smirk.

"alcohol. A lot of it."

The brunette accepted the card and looked it over.

"Wow, this looks really...real!"

They both laughed and Anya started up the cars engine. 

"Well, that's the point kid."

Lexa closed the door and popped on her seat belt, and then they were off.

Lexa didn't realize what a big mistake this was, considering she wasn't aware of how hard it would be to keep her mouth shut when she came home drunk that night.  
___

Lexa stared intently at her ID, studying it as if once she got there she'd be tested on the information.

"Don't even worry about it, kid. I'm sure that won't bother carding us."  
Anya reassured her, and she was right. With a quick glance at the card, the security guard let them right inside.

"Ok Anya, what first?"  
Lexa asked innocently.

She looked around the new club for the bar, and grinned.

"First, we get you drunk."

They pushed past the sea of drunk, and surprisingly underage people. Lexa wasn't sure how security hadn't realized the majority of these people were college students, probably all under 21.  
Anya laughed as she recognized a whole bunch of faces.  
"See, Lexa? Everyone had the same idea as me."

The two laughed and sat down at the bar. The bartender looked suspiciously at Lexa, and smiled at Anya.  
"What can I get for you two?"  
Anya took a minute to think about it.  
"Tequila shots, we'll start with 2 rounds."  
The guy nodded and made their drinks, and Anya slid hers over to Lexa.

"Like I said, they're both for you. Whenever you're ready."

Lexa rolled her eyes at Anya and laughed.  
"Fine, here goes nothing."

With the first shot down, her face scrunched up.  
"Ah fuck, that stuff burns."

Anya laughed again and patted her friend on the back.

"How do you feel"

"The same, I guess."

She slid the second shot closer to her friend.  
"Then it's time for round two."  
___

It was nearly one in the morning by the time Anya got Lexa home. She was sure her parents were asleep, so after thanking Anya for getting her home safely she made her way inside and tried to be as quiet as a drunken noobie could be. Needless to say, she failed at being quiet.

She heard a groggy voice come from her parents room and she froze. Well, she was still stumbling around the living room, but she was as frozen as she could be.

"Lexa, is that you?"  
Her dad opened their bedroom door and stepped out into the dark hallway.

Fuck, Lexa thought to herself.

He made his way to the door to be sure and Lexa held her breath.

"Why are you home so late?"

Lexa tried her hardest to come up with an excuse.  
"There was a lot of traffic.."

Either her dad didn't care too much, or he was too tired to really press it.

"Alright. Well get to bed."

Lexa started up the stairs when her dad spoke again.

"Also, I don't want you hanging out with that girl anymore. Costia I think her name is?"  
Lexa paused and her face went white.

"Why?"  
She pushed out.

"Because, Alexandria, she's a fag. I don't want you to be influenced by her anymore. Your mother told me she gave you a necklace before, and that's unacceptable. I don't want you seeing her."

Lexa's eyes began to well up and she clenched her fist, and her other hand grazed over the pendant. 

"Dad, I've been dating Costia for over a year now. NOTHING you say will keep me away from her."

She didn't even have time to process what she was saying until it was out. Her stomach turned as the disapproval washed over her fathers face.

"You what?"  
He began to walk closer to Lexa and she stumbled backwards.

"Dad I-"  
She couldn't try to defend herself. She felt a sharp sting on her face as she felt first hand what happened when her father got angry.

"You're not allowed to be gay, Alexandria. You've got until tomorrow night to tell your mother, or else I will. Together we'll figure out a punishment for you."

Lexa's hand held her cheek as her eyes welled up with tears.

"You can't tell me..w-who I am."  
She hiccuped mid-sentence.

The anger in her dads face became more visible and he raised his hand again. 

"Don't you dare try telling me what's what. I'm the adult, you'll do as I say. No child of mine will be influenced by homosexuals. No child of mine will become one. They're sick, Lexa. You're not like them."

Lexa shook her head as the tears came out. She made her way upstairs, still stumbling as the alcohol in her system and the tears blocking her view made it very hard to see the stairs and where she was going.

Her dad muttered aggressively as he stormed back into his bedroom.

Lexa made it back into her bedroom and threw herself into her bed and allowed her drunk self to cry.  
She couldn't even process what just happened. Her head hurt way too much.


	3. THIS ISNT A REAL CHAPTER, BUT ITS IMPORTANT

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> OK so my original promt was Lexa and Clarke meet in a park, BUT I have a better idea now!!
> 
> You'll see in the chapter AFTER the one that's about to go up!
> 
> Sorry for suddenly changing it up, but this is my idea that didn't come from a prompt, so I'm super excited to take this story in my own direction! 
> 
> Next chapter is going up in a few minutes, and just a heads up, the majority of it in the beginning may be hard to read.
> 
> Be safe, and enjoy <3 better things are on the way, I promise this story will have a very thick silver lining!!!

^^^^^^  
READ THE SUMMARY


	4. Broken Homes and Broken Hearts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lexa opens up to her mother after her conversation the night before with her father left a bad taste in her mouth. 
> 
> What happens next is something she was not prepared for, not at all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Quick warning, this chapter may be hard to read. There's no graphic violence, but there's mentions of it. Also, slurs. 
> 
> Read at your own discretion, but know that better things are on the way!
> 
> Remember, feedback is always welcome. I hope you enjoy this chapter, it took a lot of time to write.

When Lexa woke up the next morning, she refused to leave her room. Only bad things would happen when she did. Her head was pounding due to her hangover and there was nothing she could do about it, considering the Advil bottle was in the bathroom across the hall from her bedroom. She wouldn't be able to get there without having to hear from either of her parents. She was pretty sure her dad was at work already, but she still had to dodge her mom. 

Maybe I would be able to sneak to the bathroom, she thought to herself.  
She slid off of her bed and made her way to the door, slowly turning the nob to make as little noise as possible.   
As she stepped into the hallway, the floor creaked and she held her breath.

Luckily, her mother hadn't heard. She rushed to get to the bathroom and quietly closed the door behind her. With a long sigh, she opened the cabinet above the sink and pulled out a large container filled with pain medications. She fished through it until she found the bottle of Advil, and took two.  
Realizing she didn't have water with her, she turned on the faucet and sipped some water from the sink. 

She returned the bottle to the cabinet and shut it. She turned to leave when she heard footsteps creaking upstairs.

Lexa knew she was in trouble. There wasn't time to make it back to her room, and her mom would defiantly know she was awake now. Within seconds, she heard a knock on the bathroom door.

"Lex, are you in there?"

She held her breath and yelped out a response.

"Yeah, you should use the bathroom downstairs. May be a while in here."

There was a pause, and Lexa had to remind herself to inhale.

"When you get out, meet me in my bedroom. We need to have a little chat."

She didn't respond to her mother, instead she waited until she was sure she went back downstairs before making a mad dash from the bathroom back to her own room.   
She was petrified of the conversation she knew she'd have to have with her mother, but she secretly prayed that her father had forgotten about the things that she had said last night and that her mother wanted to talk to her about college. She clung onto the pendant of her necklace and decided to text Costia.

L: Hey you, listen. I think my parents know. Some things may have happened yesterday with my dad, and i'm scared that he told my mom. I'll keep you updated.

She anxiously waited for a response from one of the few people she fully trusted.

C: Lex, you'll be ok. They're your parents, they have to love you

Lexa grazed her knuckles over her cheek and remembered how her father had hit her.

L: My dad may or may not have hit me. I think the last thing he felt for me last night was love. He doesn't want me seeing you anymore.

It was minutes before she got another response.

C: I can't believe he would do that! Your mom is probably more understanding. If you can get out of the house, lets meet up at the park. 

She quickly typed her response.

L: I'll let you know what happens next. I have to go talk to my mom.

C: good luck. Remember, I'm in your corner.

Lexa put her phone in her pocket and slowly made her way out of her room. She was still wearing the same outfit from the night before, black jeans and a blue camisole. She had her brown leather jacket on over it, and black sneakers on her feet. She hesitantly made her way downstairs and was thankful to see her dad was nowhere to be seen. She walked over to her parents' bedroom door and knocked.

"Come on in."

She felt her anxiety swell in the pit of her stomach and she reached her quivering arm out to open the door and step inside.

Her mother was sitting on the edge of her bed and locked eyes with her daughter as soon as she stepped inside.  
"Close the door behind you and come take a seat next to me."

Lexa did as she was told and then found herself seated next to her mom. She was unable to maintain eye contact.

"So, your father tells me you came home very late last night. Where were you?"  
She felt herself holding her breath, and found herself incapable of inhaling.   
Her face quickly went pale.

"I was with Anya."

Her mom studied her face and shook her head.

"He told me that. He also told me that you came home drunk. And, that you may have said some stupid things. You know, because you were drunk."

Lexa looked up and finally caught the look in her mothers eye. She was silently offering Lexa a way out of the grave she had dug for herself. The way she saw it, she had two options. Carry on with the lie her mother was setting up for her, or stand up for herself.

"Mom.."  
She didn't know what to do, and she felt her mothers hand on her shoulder.

"I know you aren't one of them, Lexa. You're better than that. The things you said last night, you said out of rebellion. It's normal for teenagers to go through phases. But that's all that was. A phase. It was you attempting to rebel, but that's all it was. Yes?"

A long silence fell over them. Lexa was only capable of small breaths, and felt herself get light headed. She gripped her pendant and thought to herself.

-Strength. This damn this is supposed to give me strength. I need to be strong.-

"No, mom, it's true."  
The look in her moms eye went from sympathetic to angry.

"No, it's not. You're not gay. You're not allowed to be. You'll tell your father that you're sorry for lying to him when he gets home later."  
Her tone grew strict as she finished her sentence.

Lexa felt a lump in her throat as she tried to swallow her fear.

"Listen to me, mom. I'm g-gay."  
The words fumbled out of her mouth before she could stop them.  
"I've been dating Costia for a long time now. I can't lie to you or to dad anymore. I'll always be your daughter, no matter what. You guys should still love me. Right?"

Her mother let out a deep sigh and shook her head.  
"Of course we love you-"  
Lexa began to smile, but it quickly shattered.  
"However, there's no way we're allowing a faggot to stay here. You have until tomorrow morning to get all of your things together."

Lexa couldn't believe what she was hearing. She could feel her heart break within her chest.

"Y-you don't..mean that, mom? You don't mean it?"

Her mother stood up and walked around her bedroom without looking at her daughter.

"We aren't fag enablers, Alexandria. You aren't allowed to stay here. I won't allow you to condemn me or your father to hell along with you."

Lexa couldn't hold back her tears and she began to sob, still unable to breathe properly. She felt like everything was crashing down at once. 

"Dad hit me, you know. R-right in the f-f-face.."  
She managed to say in between sobs. 

"He did it to try and snap you out of it, but clearly he didn't hit you hard enough. You selfish bitch, after everything we've done for you, this is the thanks we get?"

Lexa sprang up and went to leave her mothers room when she felt a harsh tug at her wrist.  
Her mother held onto it and pulled her back.  
She stared at Lexa's face as she cried and Lexa couldn't stop shaking.

"Anything to say for yourself?"

Lexa struggled to break away from her mother, but her grip was too tight. She dragged Lexa over to her nightstand and used her free hand to point at Lexa's acceptance letter to the college of her dreams.

"You see this, bitch? This is what your father and I have been saving up for since you were born. We won't be paying for this anymore. You have until fall to figure out how you'll support yourself, because we won't."

And with that final stab, she released Lexa's arm and her daughter fell to the ground. She was trembling and couldn't control her cries. Her mother stormed out of her bedroom and slammed the door behind her. 

Lexa stayed on the ground for what felt like forever before she was able to sit upright. She pulled out her phone to text Costia. Her eyes burnt because of all the tears and her migraine flared up. 

L: My mom just told me I was getting cut off completely. That I only have until tomorrow to get all my things together, I can't live here anymore.

She brought herself back to her feet and exited her mothers room, making her way quickly back upstairs to her own room.  
Everything felt so surreal. Her mom was serious. She had no idea what she was going to do. 

L: Do you think I could stay with you for a few days until I figure something out?

A few minutes later, and she finally heard her phone ding with a reply.

C: holy shit, I didn't expect that. Can you meet me at the park? We will figure something out.

L: I'll be there in a little bit.

She slipped her phone back into her pants pocket and looked around her room for what was one of the last times she'd be able to. 

Not wanting to lug her stuff around the park, she decided to come back later to gather her things. She needed a plan first, so she quickly made her way out of the house she was no longer welcomed in and rushed into her car. She started it up, and began heading for the park.  
__

Lexa parked her car and walked to the tire swing she and Costia always found themselves swinging on. She could barely feel her feet on the ground, but she managed to make it there soon after Costia had gotten there.

"Come here, Lex."  
The shorter girl pulled Lexa in for the hug of a lifetime, but Lexa couldn't cry anymore. She left all her tears back at what used to be her home.

"Costia, I have no fucking clue what I'm supposed to do. I have no way to pay for university, and I don't even know where I'm sleeping tomorrow night."

Costia furrowed her eyebrows and tried to think of a solution.

"You know you can stay at my house with me until I leave for college. We have the rest of the summer to figure out the next step. Don't worry, Lex."

Lexa nodded slowly, remembering she had said something about that before.

"I would appreciate that more than you'd know."

Her girlfriend held her and nodded her head.

Several questions were running through Lexa's mind. She desperately searched for answers. An answer to the question of why her parents couldn't just accept who she was. Of how they could go from loving her, to kicking her out onto the streets in a matter of minutes.

She was scared shitless, but Costia made her feel secure even when everything around her was shattering.  
___

For the first couple of weeks after her parents cut her off, Lexa stayed with Costia and her parents. She knew it wouldn't last for too long, though. Summer was quickly coming to an end, and soon enough Costia would be moving upstate for college. The thought of Lexa no longer being able to attend the college of her dreams, or any college at all, totally destroyed her. However, she took advantage of the time she had a place to stay to plan out what she would do once she could no longer stay there.   
She didn't tell her girlfriends parents the truth about why she needed a place to stay, with high hopes that eventually, her parents would come to their senses and let Lexa come home. Instead, she told them that her parents had gone away for the summer and she didn't want to stay home by herself.

And it worked, but her hope quickly started to dwindle as two weeks became a month, and one month soon became two. Her parents hadn't even tried getting in contact with their daughter. 

Lexa really liked living with the Snows. Mrs Snow was pleased whenever Lexa offered to do the dishes. Although, just like Costia, she never knew why she was so eager to clean. And it wasn't just the dishes either. She often cleaned up around the house, but Mr Snow just assumed that it was Lexa's way of thanking them for letting her stay there for as long as she would be. Neither of Costia's parents questioned it. None of them knew how dirty Lexa felt. Lexa could never be clean enough after this.  
___

Back when Lexa was in her old bedroom for what was most likely the last time, she took everything she could fit in her car. Including all of her clothes, her bedding, and all of her extras like her cell phone and charger, money, and anything else a teenager would need.  
Her cell phone bill was payed for by her parents, so she figured eventually they'd cancel her plan. Luckily for her, she had messaging apps and Skype on her phone so even after she could no longer make calls, she still had a way to keep in contact with the world.

She came up with a plan over the summer while she stayed with Costia. Her plan was pretty simple.   
Keep a stable job for the summer to save up extra money, and then take her car and drive around the state, and maybe even the country.

She didn't know how her plan was actually going to work, considering she'd only be 18 by the beginning of fall and she'd be traveling alone.   
Costia promised Lexa that when she could, she'd find wherever Lexa was and come visit her, but Lexa knew that was only a sweet lie to keep a smile on her face. 

Lexa knew the two would have to break up. Still, they would remain friends. Their bond was too strong to break their friendship even after the summer ended, along with their romantic relationship.  
___

On the final night Lexa would get to stay with Costia, the girls made sure they were in bed early. They both had a lot of driving to do the next day, so getting a good nights sleep was essential. 

While Costia was anxious about her drive to her new college campus, Lexa's anxiety swallowed her as she contemplated how by morning, she'd be blindly driving on the open road with no set destination. 

The girls, while their relationship was now platonic, held each other. Costia could sense Lexa's fear, so she whispered sweet nothings to her to try and calm her anxiety.

"I can't believe that this is my last night in a real bed, cos.."

Lexa flipped herself over to face Costia, still wrapped in her arms.

Costia shook her head.

"You'll be passing plenty of hotels. I'm sure you'll find some place to crash."

Lexa gave her an aggravated sigh.

"You know my plan. To drive around to god knows where, and see where life takes me. I've only got a little over a thousand saved, and I'm not about to waste it on dinky hotels."

Costia gave a slow nod, as she felt her eyes gently shut.

"You better skype me, Woods. I want to make sure we stay in touch."

Soon after, Lexa's eyes too began to close. 

"Yeah, I promise. Don't you worry."

Before she knew it, she was asleep.


	5. Open Roads and Open Minds

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anya's just really good at looking out for Lexa

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All right you guys, sorry if this chapter seems short, but the next one will be out soon!
> 
> Thank you for reading, and as always feedback is always welcomed!! <3
> 
> By the way, some interesting things are going to happen down the road, so get ready :)

Sharp beeping of the alarm clock on Costia’s nightstand pierced through Lexa’s ears. With a groan of defiance, she rolled over and buried her face deeper into the pillows. She extended her arm, blindly swatting it around until her hand hit the top of the alarm clock, shutting it off momentarily.   
The warmth of the blankets wrapped around her sleepy body made Lexa feel safe. She wasn’t ready to give it up. As adult as she thought she was, she was still only a teenager-a teenager who wasn’t yet ready to take the next step in her life. It demanded sacrifice, taking risks, and leaving behind the only life she’s ever known. With the comfort of her best friend next to her and the soft mattress beneath her, and warm blankets covering her, why on earth would she get up now? 

Suddenly, the alarm clock reminded her once again that she wasn’t allowed to relax anymore.   
It was time to grow up. 

“Fucking hell, how do you shut this thing off?” Lexa spoke in a groggy voice. 

She heard a small chuckle coming from the girl beside her, so she picked her head up ever so slightly to face her.

“Hm? What’s so funny?” She playfully poked Costia in the arm.

“You hit snooze, not the power button.” 

Lexa rolled her eyes, and then sat up in the bed. She looked over at the alarm and her eyes glanced over at all of the buttons until she found the small round one on the side, with the power icon. With one delicate push, the room fell silent again. With a sigh of relief, lexa plopped back down and snuggled into the pillows again.

“Usually, Lex, when you turn of the alarm clock, it means you’re getting out of bed.”

Costia propped herself up on her elbows and her sleepy eyes grazed over Lexa. She knew the brunette must be dreading today, and she was too. She never was good with goodbyes. With Costia, it was always see you later. Never goodbye. 

“Yeah, well I don’t see why we can’t just stay here a little longer. Not like I’m in a rush to get anywhere.”  
Lexa felt her anxiety start to swell in her stomach as her sarcastic demeanor took control of that last sentence. She had no idea of where she’d go first, and it scared her not knowing where she'd be driving. 

Since Anya knew about what was happening, Lexa's doubt about not having a destination faded away quickly after she had received a text from Anya saying she was looking up nice towns and cities Lexa would like. Anya was always looking out for Lexa like that. She didn’t know most of them very well, but it was a place to start. With another playful punch on the arm from Costia, Lexa finally rolled out of bed. She picked out something to wear that would be comfortable for traveling in; a simple tee shirt and jeans would do. 

___

Within the next hour or so, she made sure nothing was left behind of her stuff while tucking everything away in her car. After cleaning out Costia’s room of her belongings, she made her way back inside to indulge in some fresh pancakes and bacon that were there waiting for her.  
Breakfast that morning was extra delicious, courtesy of Mrs. Snow, who insisted she did the dishes this time. Lexa nodded with a smile, and handed over her dirty plate and utensils. 

“So, Lexa, did you ever tell Anya that you were taking a, uh, a road trip?”  
Costia tried not to indirectly spill the beans to her mother who, just a few feet away, was hovering over the sink.

“Yeah she knows. She told me that once she found some free time that she would come meet up with me, so there’s that to look forward to.”  
The brunette looked down at the table, where her arms were folded and resting on top of it.

“Well I’ll be sure to have my turn, too.”

Lexa looked up to share a quick, bittersweet smile with Costia. The warm silence that wafted throughout the room was quickly shattered when Lexa’s phone buzzed. She quickly picked it up, and to her amusement, saw that Anya had sent directions to one of her favorite cafes that just so happened to be in the same direction of where she was heading first. She replied with a small grin tugging at her lips.

L: I’ll be sure to check it out

A: Let me know what you think of it! Also, the town it’s in is really nice. You may like it there

 

A confused look spread across Lexa’s face. What did Anya mean by that? 

L: Anya?

A: I just mean that it’s a small, easy going place. If you’re sick of traveling it’s a good place to take a break.

L: Ah ok, I’ll keep that in mind. I’ll be hitting the road soon so I’ll probably call you once I get bored.

Lexa would’ve rather seen her only other close friend in person before she left, but Anya was already at her college campus and couldn’t make it back before Lexa’s time at Cotia’s place was up. Still, they managed to see each other plenty of times throughout the summer. Now that summer was gone, Lexa knew she had to be too. She could’ve just stayed local, hell Costia’s parents probably would’ve kept her over if she explained the situation, but Costia and Anya were the only real friends Lexa had. With them both away at college, who would she hang out with?   
Lexa kind of enjoyed the idea of traveling anyways. Who knows, maybe she’d find someone else who wanted to travel along the way somewhere. 

___

It was about one in the afternoon by the time Lexa had said her goodbyes to Costia and her parents. She was in her car, ready to start the next chapter in her life, when there was a knock on the passengers side door. It was Costia. Lexa quickly unlocked the door and the shorter girl climbed inside, and leaned over to hug Lexa again. Lexa returned her hug.

“Be safe, Lex. Make sure you take lots of pictures, meet some new people, and make something out of this.”

Lexa laughed a little bit and they both pulled away from each other.

“I’m actually looking forward to this, in a really weird way. My first stop is pretty far away, though. I need to get going.”

Costia nodded, but didn’t leave quit yet. Instead, she pulled a little CD holder out to Lexa.

“I hope mix tapes aren’t too cliché, but I figured you could use some travel tunes.”

“Haha, no this is great! Thanks, Cos.”

“Well you should get going. May we meet again, Lexa.”

“Don’t worry, we will.”

Then, the two hugged once again, and Costia slipped out of the car, shutting the door behind her, and waved to Lexa as she pulled out of the driveway and down the street. Lexa popped in the new CD she had received and felt herself smile at the first song that began to play through her speakers:

Born To Be Wild by Steppenwolf. 

It was one of their favorite songs to jam out to as kids, and now it seemed to make more sense. All of this certainly was wild. In front of her now was the wide open road, only now she actually had an idea as to where she was going thanks to Anya. Knowing her blonde friend, there was probably people in the town she'd mentioned before that would be waiting to meet her. There was only one way for Lexa to find out, and what seemed like a million miles between her and the cafe that she studied the directions to.


End file.
